Eet smakelijk!

My husband and I like to experiment on people. Not on the person, actually, but more using people as guinea pigs. We would never actually do this to a guinea pig, and no animals were harmed, let alone in the area, during the making of this dish. It's this odd habit we have of generally making dinner we have never tried before and feeding it to guests. Granted, we experiment with food all the time when it's just us, but guests are not spared with an old standby. After that lengthy introduction, we had the missionaries over time to eat with us, and we made an excellent dish. I would do it again, and again, and again, until I started to wonder what all the cream and bacon was doing to my cardiovascular system. But that's another topic. Here is the recipe. It's good. Try it.

What did I change? I used chicken thighs, bone in, no skin. It worked fine, but make sure the juices run clear. Also, I used bacon in place of the pancetta. And I have no idea what Charlotte potatoes are. Red potatoes worked great. Tasty!

Dear Alexander,

8 October 2011

I went to sleep after hearing my cousin was in the hospital and dreamt all night he was in surgery and dying on his sister's wedding day and while I was trying to wake up, my husband rolled over and by mistake pinned me down while I tried to sit up and I could tell it was probably going to be a mixed up, run down, washed out every day day.

At breakfast my husband found an excellent frittata recipe on his computer but all I found on my computer was  'View your banking document' message.

I think I'll go fishing in Wyoming.

On the way to pick up bread the car door frame lunged at my head and really hurt and while I waited for the light to change my head kept pounding and the cars in front of me kept cutting me off and I felt like a crybaby.

I am having a mixed up, run down, washed out every day day I told myself. No one even answered.

There was a dead bee in the leek leaves for dinner and I hate dead bees. There was no ice cream for dessert because it was Saturday and I hate no ice cream days.

The dish water was too hot, I ran into the open cupboard door with the other side of my head, the garbage can was dripping something and my hair was frizzy. I hate my hair when it gets frizzy.

When I went to bed, my husband took my pillow and hit me with it and said we should pillow fight, my eye was hurting, and I got a mosquito bite.

He still wanted to sleep next to me though.

It has been a mixed up, run down, washed out every day day. He said some days are like that.

Even while fishing.

Smelly stuff

My little home often smells a little off when I walk in, including, but not limited to the fact that people live here, my neighbor's smoke gently wafts into our living room, we probably should take the garbage out more often, and a cat lived here once. In order to combat these smells and promote natural things in our home, I decided to try making a difference...or at least add a nice scent to mix in with the rest. I mixed rosemary, marjoram, cloves, allspice, cinnamon stick, and a little bit of black peppercorn, put it in my freshly made bag, and hung it up.

Has it made a difference? Not really, though I did catch a hint of it once. I try.

Go Dutch

Sept. 9 marks the anniversary of my return to the States after serving as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the Netherlands. I served there for about 16 months and learned a lot about myself and other people. I loved learning the creative and industrious way the Dutch people live.

What have I done since I returned 6 years ago? I married, graduated with a Bachelor's degree in Exercise Science, moved 8 times, held 7 jobs (one as short as 1 day (my client died the day after I started) and as long as 2.5 years and counting), visited 10 different states and 5 different countries, and certified as a Lifestyle and Weight Management Coach. Sounds busy.

So the toilet paper thieves have struck my home. We'll call this thief Simon. Simon leaves empty toilet paper roles on the holder. Occasionally, this makes for uncomfortable circumstances when one is in need of such paper. In my busyness this week, I decided to prevent Simon's doings further.
My experience in the Netherlands taught me that all bathrooms, or rather the WC, need 3 things above and beyond the toilet itself. Each WC contains a toilet bowl brush, a birthday calendar, and a spare paper roll holder. Generally these were lacy, fluffy white, beribboned contraptions. Not to break with tradition, but I didn't want lace, so I repurposed my old pants to do the job. Time to find another busy project.

Hup Hup Holland!

And a second try, this time with part of a dress.

The onion wrapper

My wish for a vegetable brush has increased to the point that I have actually looked for one. Amazing that someone like me would actually buy something out of normal weekly groceries. It's true; I don't like shopping. 

But today, while at the local whole foods store, I checked out their selection of kitchen gadgets and, lo and behold, found various good options. Wood, plastic, colored, seemingly limitless possibilities. One nice red one was priced about $3.50. Fine, lovely, except that it was just an onion sack with an elastic around the top to keep it on your hand. Brilliant, but am I really going to pay someone to package and name my onion sack scrubber? No, I'm going to go peel my onions out of the sack and scrub. No assembly required. Sure, it may fall apart after a few uses, but by then I'll have a new sack of onions. This way, I won't have to wonder how to clean it when it turns green and smells like the socks that haven't seen the light of day for a few weeks after the gym. I can just toss it and get another. Thanks for the inspiration you packaged, elastified little scrubby!

Curling and Cake

This post has nothing to do with hair. We're talking the sport of curling, with the rocks, brooms, and lots of ice. Last weekend two of my favorite people got married. (They made it!) The groom is Canadian, thus in honor of the traditions of the Great White North, the bride readily agreed to my idea of making a grooms cake resembling a curling rock. (The technical term is rock, not stone. I like being technical.)

This cake gave me an opportunity to learn what not to do in many, many aspects of cake making. You can learn them too, if you like.

I started by trying various cake recipes, and I landed on this one, thanks to my sister. I did decrease the sugar by a third, 2 cups instead of 3 cups, but I like less sweetness. I tried it out as cupcakes first and it worked perfectly. When I finally baked the cake, in three 9 inch pans, as the recipe suggests, the cake hardly rose at all and barely touched the sides of the pan. Something didn't work. Undaunted, or maybe a little daunted, I tried again, this time using a little more batter in the pan. It helped, but still didn't get as much lift as I wanted. Maybe 8 inch would work better.

For the filling, I wanted something non-fruit and non-whipped cream, something new, so I decided pastry filling, like what is used in Boston Cream Pie. My friend earned her master's degree in Boston, so I found it fitting. It's a recipe in the Joy of Cooking:

• Beat together until thick and pale yellow 1/3 c sugar, 2 T flour, 2 T cornstarch, and 4 large egg yolks.
• Slowly heat 1 1/3 c milk until simmering, stirring almost constantly.
• Add about 1/3 of the milk mixture, stirring quickly to temper the eggs without cooking them. Then add it all back in the pan, and stirring constantly and scraping the sides, heat on medium low until the mixture is thick.
• Pour into a new bowl and add 3/4 t vanilla. Cover with a layer of plastic or wax paper directly on the mixture. This prevents a non-yummy film from hardening on top of the cream. Cool a bit, then refrigerate for up to 4 days.

The icing is chocolate chips melted in a double boiler, or a non-melting bowl in a pot of simmering water, with a splash of water, and some butter added at the end to make it smooth. This can stay out of the fridge and is really yummy. The red chips were treated the same way, except they were red.

As you can see, the handle is rice crispies treat. My kitchen timer made a useful form to keep the handle up for long enough that it would set.

The set up of the cake was by far the most difficult part. Little did I know that this semi-solid pastry cream would easily melt into a not very pretty mess, leaving a very flat cake behind. Next time, use whipped cream or butter cream icing to make a well for the cream to sit it. I tried this on a second attempt, though my camera had died by then, only to revive later and die again, so I have no pictures of it. It's probably the best part of the story to skip anyway.

I had already tried to dip the handle in the red chocolate, but it wasn't very smooth, so my husband and I decided to try using a blow dryer to heat it enough to smooth it out. It worked beautifully once I decided to stop being so careful and just crank the thing. I hope I didn't scare the semi deaf dog in the process.

For the cake, I dumped a bunch of the warmed chocolate (warmed in a pot of hot water, not with the blow dryer) over the cake which was on a rack, and allowed the chocolate to run all over. It's best to work quickly so the chocolate doesn't harden in the wrong spot or too early. If it does, dip a metal knife or spatula in hot water, dry it, and use the heat from the knife to smooth it out.

With some left overs, I made little curling stones, just for some extra flare. I used straws for the handles. Even they had problems with oozing filling, so the take home is make a well, or maybe just a little hole in the little ones, to keep in the filling!!!

Best part: the gasp of delight bringing it out and the pleasure on the faces of those that enjoyed it. Cake done!

Wedding day advice

My apologies for those sick of wedding news, but Saturday will make the third wedding we have attended in 3 weeks. If a wedding is in your near future, here is my list of things, in no particular order, not to worry about...not that these are all from personal experience.

• If your maid of honor looks like a bag because her dress doesn't fit, it just makes the bride look better. If she breaks down in sobs, she can go cry in the corner.
• If your grandmother breaks her ribs the night before your wedding, it's okay.
• If your cake starts falling over, that's okay too.
  
• If it rains, it's only water. No need to fret.
• If your cousin or your sister need stitches because of a wedding injury, not to worry.
• If someone is sewing wedding clothes a few hours before the wedding, that's normal.
• If the best man doesn't know how to wear cuff links, no sweat. If he forgets his shoes, black socks and sandals look almost as good. Or maybe he can borrow some tennis shoes.
• If your garter gets stuck in the tree, let the men jump for it.
• If the 4-year-old decides she doesn't like the punch and dumps it back in the bowl, at least it's diluted.
• If the bouquet gets flung into the neighbor's yard, just hope the dog won't get it.
• If someone cannot drive because their dress is too restricting, they can change.
• If the bride forgets her slip, send the fiance.
• If a person of importance in the ceremony isn't informed she needs to help you, the guests can wait.

Any other tips?

Best day

On my grandfather's 90th birthday (Happy Birthday, Grandpa!), I asked him what one day he would like to relive. He could have said the day he graduated college, or the day he met Grandma, or the day he became a father. He could have said the day he had $X0,000 in his bank account or the day he got a big promotion. After a minute of thought, he told me it was a day he was home on leave from the Navy during World War II when he learned that he didn't have to go back. A few minutes into dinner, he changed his mind and said maybe VJ day was a better option, in learning that the war was over. He continued changing every few minutes, and finally ended with the day my older brother was born. (Why that was anyone's favorite day, oh...) One day he never mentioned, even with Grandma's repeated encouragement, was his wedding day.

With the marriage of one of my best friends next week and my own anniversary (Happy Anniversary, Exceptional Husband!), plus after attending two weddings a few weeks ago, that big day has been on my mind. So many people look forward to that one day as the best day ever, the one magical day where all things wonderful happen. Every good fairy tale ends with a wedding. Ever happily ever after begins with one. Every celebrity wedding is covered in extreme detail. But is our wedding day focused society part of the reason for 50+% divorce rate and millions of unhappy couples? What would change if we looked into making a marriage work rather than planning the perfect one day wedding? Now, all that said, I don't downplay the actual wedding as anything less than the most significant promise we can make, but for me, if I could replay one day in the past year, I would pick a quiet Sunday afternoon where we read books together, or an afternoon playing racquetball (though not the one that my shot landed on his face), or maybe the day we fed very active ostriches on our honeymoon. None of those days have any pomp or circumstance, but they didn't have any stress or anxiety (or lack of sleep) either. My view might be skewed because I did feel a little stressed on the day of the wedding (no cold feet, no backing out, just a lot of people and so many things to do!), but I want more best days to come, rather than pining for one and only day that already happened.

What day would you relive?

Lifestyle and Weight Management Coach

To everybody:

LWMC? What is that? That's me! I am now certified to work as a Lifestyle and Weight Management Coach. This week, I passed the exam. Passing was Part 1.

So what does that mean? It means that I still have a lot to figure out, but here are a few things I want to do:

• Assist people as they work to achieve lifestyle changes to create a healthier, more active life.
• Teach others how to set and accomplish achievable goals.
• Motivate people to do things they didn't think possible.

My list looks small, but it's only the beginning. Here's to Part 2.

Me, LWMC

Traveler's guide

My brother lives in a little white house,

With 3 little gray kittens who chase the mouse,

And lots of fuzzy chickens and a little red wagon,

And a realio, trulio, really big black gun.

He has another kitten too, but it's kind of orange. It's a boy, though, so he's my nephews' favorite. My brother moved his family to a top pick of most visited destinations, so I thought to give future travelers a few thoughts on making the most of their visit.

Things to know:

• It's worth the trip.
• Only go in to the gas station if you have time for a chat.
• Chaps are in fashion. Feel free to wear them. Cowboy hats are welcome as well.

Things to see and do:

• Jump on the bed. The house came with an extra dusty mattress, now exclusively used for jumping.
• Watch the chickens and guinea chase bugs and zip around their little house. It's better than TV.
• Swat flies. They have a good supply, so don't hold back.
• Shoot a few rounds at the hay bail target. Try not to miss.

Things NOT to worry about:

• The coyotes and owls are not after you. They want the chickens or guinea fowl.
• The stink bugs and the earwigs aren't that bad. Just watch out before you use anything that may be moist, like a toothbrush or a washcloth.
• The scary basement is not haunted. It just has a frog and lots of old food. (The frog is live. Try to avoid stepping on it.)
• If wasps periodically drop from the tree on you, just step away. The chickens can eat them.
• My sister-in-law is a gracious hostess. If you need anything, just ask.

Things to bring:

• A fly swatter
• Shoes without laces that attract burrs and grass seeds...or be prepared to pick them out.
• A good sense of adventure. We had a great time.

Also, feel free to drive like my brother...at least, my older brother. The younger one only has a permit.

Please don't eat me!

I like wildlife. I even like little animals in my garden. But we have a problem. The leaves on some of our plants started looking like this (see photos) this week. It didn't look like bugs, because it had kind of a beaky look to the bite marks. I wondered if lizards ate leaves...? and I wondered if birds ate leaves. After much pondering, I still hadn't come up with an answer, until yesterday when I found a little yellow bird standing on our bamboo pole pecking at a tomato leaf. Scandalous!

So now it's time to decide how to stop the problem, maybe

without destroying the wildlife... though the cat stuck up the tree last week during the thunder storm was a bit of a bother, mostly because her owners were whistling at 11:00 pm trying to get her down, which really wasn't very effective. So far I have only thought of netting, and have yet to try it. If you have other opinions or ideas, please share.

Close enough Tikka Masala

Looking at this picture, you may not think, 'Oh boy! Let me try some of that.' (You may actually wonder if this is a pre-chewed meal.) But, appearances can be deceiving, because last night was the Best Dinner Ever!!!

Not to brag, since I do it all the time, but it was amazing! I probably stared at my plate for a full minute thinking 'Did I make that?!' Who knew that I could cook something more than fairly good?! No, this was epic.

Naturally I didn't follow the recipe, because my kitchen didn't have everything it called for, but substitution makes things interesting. Before you get tired of reading, here's a warning that this post is very long and the recipe seems complicated, but it is absolutely worth any work, even if the picture doesn't look it. Ready to dive in? Here goes:

Close Enough Murgh Tikka Masala (Grilled Chicken in a Spicy Sauce) (It's Indian Food) (Serves 3-4)

Ingredients:

• 1 pound of boneless, skinless chicken
• half a chopped onion
• dash of cayenne pepper
• few mint leaves
• few Tbls of plain yogurt
• drop of sesame oil or butter
• salt
• canola oil

• dash of
  garlic
• powdered ginger

• 2 large tomatoes
• 1/2 c cilantro
• 1 T ground coriander
• ground cumin
• dried fenugreek leaves
• 1 t paprika
• garam masala
• salt
• 1 c water
• 1/2 c cream
• rice, to serve

Marinate the chicken

Cut about 1 pound of boneless, skinless chicken into 1-2 inch chunks, evenly sized.

Marinate for 6-24 hours in Marinade:

• In food processor or blender, blend to a paste half a chopped onion, a dash of cayenne pepper, a few mint leaves, some garlic, a few Tbls of plain yogurt, a dash of garam masala, and a bit of salt.

(What is Garam Masala? It's a spice used in lots, if not all, Indian dishes. It comes pre-mixed in the spice section of many grocery stores, or you can mix your own. To find spices for a good price, check whole foods stores for bulk spices. That way you don't have to pay for the fancy packaging.)

If you don't have yogurt, try sour cream. I wouldn't do it all the time, but it worked out this time.

Cook the chicken

After marinating, heat a grill, fry pan, or grill pan and cook the chicken completely. Use any extra marinade to baste, but beware that the marinade burns faster than the chicken turns brown if the pan is too hot. Oops. Transfer to a new bowl.

Finish the chicken

To the finished chicken, add 1 Tbls vegetable oil and a drop of sesame oil or butter. Sprinkle with dried fenugreek leaves, a little salt, and cumin. Keep the chicken warm.

(We're getting close to the finish, I promise.)

The Sauce:

Fried Onion paste

Thinly slice 1/2 onion. Heat enough canola oil to cover the bottom of a pan and fry the onion until browned. Put into the food processor, or blender, and add a dash of garlic, powdered ginger, and enough plain yogurt to make it smooth.

The rest of the sauce

Puree 2 large tomatoes, or about 16 oz canned tomato, with 1/2 c cilantro. Add the puree to the remaining oil in the pan from the onion paste and cook to remove the juices (5-10 minutes) stirring regularly.

Add spices (1 T ground coriander, 1 t ground cumin, 2 t dried fenugreek leaves, 1 t paprika, 1 t garam masala, 1 t salt, or to taste). Cook 1 min.

Add 1 c water and the chicken. Simmer for 5 mins. Add 1/2 c cream. Cook 5 mins more. Garnish with fresh cilantro and serve over rice. I like jasmine rice, myself.

Go forth! Try it!

(And here is the book with the original recipe, just to give credit)

Calling all bakers: Cake

Birthday cake, graduation cake, wedding cake, holiday cake, groom's cake, shower cake, baby cake...it's everywhere. Yet so often I hear people say, 'Oh what a lovely cake, but I don't really like cake that much.'

Why is it so easy to make something look amazing and taste mediocre? Unfortunately, I am a guilty baker myself.

Soon I get to make another. I'm excited, but my goal is that this one will actually taste good. Really good. I know I'm being demanding, but while my bakery experience taught me how to make it look good, but I want more than the watering eyeball and 'No, thank you' response. Of course, it has to look right, too.

Here's where you come in. These are my pleas to the world wide universe:

1. What is a good chocolate cake recipe for a stalked, sculpted cake?
2. And I have to make a handle, preferably edible, shaped like and L that has tipped over, thus lacking much support. What will hold the shape and not fall over or get soft?

You know where the box is.

Pineapple

Say Hello to my pineapple. I grew it with the help of my brother. It took 5 years to mature, which happened to be the time my parents were considering permanent removal. Luckily, it started blooming about the same time they got serious about taking it out.

My brother and I each took the top of a store-grown pineapple, let it dry for a few days, to prevent root-rot, and then planted it. We watered, watched, and mostly waited until 4.5 years later, on the day I was leaving for Stockholm, I noticed a flower stalk coming out of the center. It was a proud moment. 6 months later, we enjoyed the fruits of our labors, well, fruit. Bugs ate the other one.

What I learned:

• It's actually possible to grow pineapple, and no, they still don't grow underground, as I've often heard.
• Drying out the pineapple is necessary! It will rot otherwise.
• Some suggest watering from the top of the plant rather than at the base. That way the water catches in the leaves, like rainwater.
• Patience is a virtue - a very tasty one!
• The plant needs a good amount of sun and good soil. Our plants had mediocre soil and semi good sun. Maybe that's why it took so long.
• Experts, if anyone online is an expert, suggest placing an apple core in the plant center and covering the plant with a plastic garbage bag for a week to encourage flower growth. I tried it and it mostly burned the plant cause it got too hot under the bag.
• The flower is really cool! It's blue!
• 
  

"Come along, Mop...

...," said my loving husband the day I donated my hair. But, the resemblance is strong, so along I went.

What I learned:

• Southern Arizona is a great place for short hair.
• The hair dressers at Great Clips always treat you like you are a little bit dumb.
• Donating is great! Hopefully some less behaired person than I will enjoy my hair. I don't miss it.
• At least 10 inches is required for Locks of Love.
• But Great Clips gives you a haircut for free, even if they question your sanity... and the donatability of your hair. (i.e. She found my head somewhat lacking in aesthetics I guess.)

On Freedom

God bless America, the land of the free. Our job? To be brave in order keep it that way. Happy Independence Day!

Of things that matter most

Remember the time when company came over and all you spent the whole time checking the punch bowl level or filling the dessert tray. Or maybe that time you gave that big presentation and that really great opening clip didn't work, so the entire production failed. Or you forgot to bring the refreshments to a recent gathering and couldn't relax and enjoy. Or maybe your shoes didn't quite match those pants like you wanted them to. Welcome to mortality, the place to learn what really matters.

Anyone well acquainted with my parents know how nice the yard looks and how orderly and clean the house is. So, when my parents and various siblings came to visit a few weeks ago, I was annoyed with myself that I had a stack of dishes within 10 minutes of their arrival and seemingly no time to do them. As I fretted and apologized for the third time about not being more clean, my mom said she hoped that I wanted to spend time with the family rather than do dishes. Oh. Okay. Lesson learned.

So, this morning as my husband I decided that rather than attack the dishes, organize the desk, plan tasks for the day, respond to emails, or check on the plants, I would pay attention to him,especially since his time at work has extended longer with each passing day this week, by following him around. Lest you think it's creepy, it was kind of fun to just be with him. It boosts his ego, I think. Maybe that time is one of the things that matter most. Thank you President Uchtdorf.

What matters most to you?

The Price is Right

Sorry to disappoint, but this post has nothing to do with Plinko or the Showcase Showdown. My only comment on the TV show is that I miss Bob Barker, or I would if I ever watched the show.

Instead this is about finding the best prices for stuff in the grocery store. While at the store, comparing prices/quality between brands seems normal, but what about comparing store to store/time of year/etc? A few months ago, I found the suggestion to keep a Grocery Book (no source here, sorry) to track common items over a period of time to compare the price. One thing to keep in mind is the size of the item. For example, if a 15 oz can of diced tomatoes is $0.90 on sale, great! Buy it, right? But if a 28 oz can is $1.50, this one is the better deal, per ounce, assuming you can use that much in one dish, or don't mind saving some for later. Another thing to keep in mind is if you can use the larger items before they go bad. By tracking items for a few months, it's easier to see a pattern of what price is...right. It's a little tedious at first, but it does pay off. Here's an example (please excuse the formatting.):

Category Item Date Store Unit price Total

Produce Blackberries 1/3 Alb .165/oz 0.99

Blueberries 1/3 Alb .165/oz 0.99

1/26 Sunf 1.77/pint 1.77

Broccoli 10/27 Safe .88/lb 0.82

11/17 Fry 1.00/lb 0.85

11/30 Sunf 1.59/lb 0.95

1/5 Sunf 1.00/lb 0.63

3/2 Sunf .99/lb 0.65

Cabbage 11/30 Sunf 1.00/lb 1.16

1/26 Sunf .50/lb 0.89

3/9 Alb .39/lb 1.32

Carrots 11/13 Alb .59/lb 2.99

11/2 Alb .69/lb 0.69

1/20 Alb .60/lb 2.99

2/23 Fry .49/lb 2.49

Yet another thing to remember is what type of item. If the item is broccoli crowns vs. broccoli, stalk and all, there is usually a significant price difference. Is that too many things to keep in mind?

If you have any other helpful hints, please share. Otherwise, have your pets spayed or neutered. Or not.

Five year old eyes

My budding photo-journalist sister, age 5, documented the 5th grade promotion of another sister today. Here are the highlights:

The...end.?

Lettuce...eat!

In light of the new food guide, here's another segment on how our tiny garden spot is contributing to the vegetable group.

Lettuce is a spring and fall crop, though I tried during the winter too, since it is usually mild here. That didn't work too well, but once it warmed up a bit, they did fairly well for having less than a square foot space to grow. The photo is the final harvest, and though it's not much, nutritionally or monetarily, it has added to the fun in our food. It's been 100 F enough, and they gave baked often enough, that it is time to pull out for a new summer vegetable, still TBD.

Things to remember:

• As always, avoid over watering!
• Plant every two weeks during the spring and fall, or when you have spring and fall like weather, in order to have a constant crop. This what I want to try next time.
• Harvesting the leaves increases production.
• The variety lettuce pack is nice because of the...variety!
• Once it gets too warm, the plant will send up a flower stalk. Clip it off to force the plant to produce a little longer, though it means that the leaves are going to get tougher.

(Does you know how to make the font color change? I highlight the word and tell it to change, so it does, but it doesn't publish that way. I could learn html, and edit that way, but why doesn't it just behave?)

MRE cookies anyone?

Tornado, hurricane, earthquake, fire, food shortage, unemployment, illness...do these sound familiar? Sounds like the daily news and bad things can happen anywhere. Rather than just hoping for the best, I want to prepare for it, as much as I know how. Over the past few months, we have worked on making full service 72-hour kits, or bug-out bags. The project of the day is to consolidate and organize. That way we can figure out what we still need. More on that later.

As part of the food supply, we are the proud owners of several MREs in various states of completeness. These MREs contain a main dish, utensils, matches, drink mix, salt, pepper, sugar, a hand wipe, a granola bar, and a dessert. This is what one of the desserts looks like:

Lest you don't recognize this sweet delight, it claims to be a chocolate chip cookie. We have nearly 30 of these, so I decided to venture in to see what might be in our emergency culinary future. Here's what I discovered:

• The package contained 3 cookies, all seemingly chocolate chip. News: This non-resealable package contains 1.5 servings of cookies. If you count calories, keep that in mind. Maybe a friend will need one.
• While one may not want to serve these with tea or to guests, the taste fits the level of some grocery store cookies, or some rather unfortunate homemade cookies. It has that nice baking soda taste that my father generously pointed out in so many baked goods, so now I notice it all the time, but the soda taste is masked by a stronger mystery flavor. Maybe it's the ammonium bicarbonate.
• The texture is slightly less grainy than the sand cookies we found at a local bakery a few months ago. They were not actually sand, but some edible imitation. Come visit and we can get some.
• These cookies are thirst inducing! Only partake if you have plenty of water or a toothbrush close by.
• MREs are supposed to last 5-7 years, depending on how well they are stored, however, there is no package date. Probably should label these guys. Any suggestions on what to do when it's time to rotate? Compost? Boy Scout camp? Dinner party? You are invited!

Bottoms up

Yesterday I experience something you never have. At least, one would hope that you are fortunate enough (and smart enough) to never have such a thing happen to you. What happened? My head collided with the pointy underside of a metal toilet paper dispenser.

How was I so graceful in doing such a thing? As I was changing at the gym, in a stall, and I bent down to pick up my shoes. Generally, my spacial awareness kicks in quickly, but this time it underestimated the amount of room my cranium requires. On the return trip to the full and upright position, my skull crashed into the razor tipped dispenser. For a moment, I stayed down, a little confused at why the spaciality went faulty, but quickly checked for broken skin. The force of the impact would point to yes, though my trusty skull must be harder that that now bent edge. Okay, I didn't bend it, but it did remove a nice chunk of hair. Thankfully, I can stand to lose a few. And for the awkwardness of the situation, I'm grateful the stall didn't look like this.

Parmesan chicken

• Dinner was really yummy last night, but since I never follow a recipe exactly, I have to record my changes. But that's why I blog; it's my digital notebook. The inspirational recipe comes from Food Network's Tyler Florence and here's how I did it differently:

Parmesan Chicken

• Extra-virgin olive oil
• 1/2 medium onion, chopped
• 2 garlic cloves, minced
• 1/2 cup olives, pitted
• Basil (I used dried since my fresh plants keep dying.)
• 1 (28-ounce) can diced tomatoes
• Pinch sugar
• Salt and black pepper
• 4 skinless, boneless, chicken thighs (about 3/4 pounds)
• 1/2 cup all-purpose flour
• 1 large eggs, lightly beaten
• 1 tablespoon water
• 1/2 cup dried bread crumbs and/or cornmeal
• A bit of cheddar, grated
• Freshly grated Parmesan
• 1/2 pound spaghetti, cooked

Saute onion and garlic in hot oil. Taste the onion for doneness before adding basil, to taste, crushed olives and tomatoes. Cook on low, occasionally stirring, for a long time while you clean, shower, or complete other tasks. Once the sauce is thickened, add salt, pepper, and sugar to taste. If the tomato tastes too acidic, add 1 T of butter at a time until the flavors balance.

If the chicken is thick, pound it between layers of plastic to 1/2 inch. Set out 3 shallow bowls or rimmed plates for the flour, egg, and bread crumbs. Season the flour and crumbs with salt and pepper. Beat the water and egg until well mixed. Heat oil on the stove for frying. Coat each piece of chicken thoroughly with flour, shaking off excess (using a fork or spoon to coat and transfer between coatings makes this less messy), then dip in eggs, allowing the excess to drip off. Finally, cover in bread crumbs, again shaking excess, and fry for a few minutes on each side.

Heat oven to 450 F. Once the coating is crispy, place chicken in oven proof dish and cover with the sauce, then cheese. Bake until cheese is melty, bubbly, or crisp, however you like it, and serve over spaghetti. It was good.

Serves 3-4

What I learned:

• Check the onion to make sure it is soft before adding anything. Fragrance does not equal done.
• Add butter to reduce the acidity of the tomatoes.
• Forks make this process a lot easier for coating chicken.
• Cornmeal works in place of bread crumbs, but the aesthetics are different.
• Thigh meat doesn't dry out as easily as breast meat. I tend to over cook chicken, thus drying it out, but this was excellent.

The chocolate covered food group

Take heart Americans! Life just got better here. No longer need we feel deprived. Recognize these? These are the remnants of the box of Belgian delight I discovered yesterday. This stick used to hold a magic wonder, in the form of chocolate covered ice cream. The Magnum was one of the major food groups while I lived in Europe as a missionary and it has been a struggle trying to get a balanced diet in the States. But gone are the days of crossing the pond and now is the time to cross the street to the local grocery store. True to form, they come in a box of 3. Usually, we would buy these on the way to somewhere, and had no access to a freezer, which meant somebody got to eat 2. Maybe that someone can be me this time. Do you think my husband will notice?

Butternut stew

Yum.

Pumpkin and I get along in pies and cookies, but never in soups or stews. Butternut squash is very similar in flavor and in uses, so I hesitated in trying this recipe, even though the squash has graced our counter since Christmas. That was only 6 months ago... but this was worth the wait.

The original recipe is here, but naturally, my non-conformist cook had to change it. Plus, I never go to the store for two ingredients when substitutes are available.

• 1 tablespoon olive oil
• 9 ounces fresh Andouille sausage, but any sausage might work
• 1 medium yellow onion, medium dice
• 4 medium garlic cloves, thinly sliced
• 1 pound butternut squash, cut into 1-inch pieces
• 10 ounces potatoes, large dice
• 3/4 teaspoon caraway seeds
• 1 (28-ounce) can diced tomatoes
• 3 cups chicken stock
• 5 ounces spinach, fresh or frozen

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Place oil in a large saucepan or Dutch oven over medium heat. When it shimmers, add sausage and cook, turning occasionally, until well browned all over, about 15 to 20 minutes. Remove to a plate and set aside.
2. Return the pan to the stove over medium heat, add onion and garlic, and season with salt and freshly ground black pepper. Cook, stirring occasionally, until golden brown and soft, about 10 minutes. Add squash and potatoes and cook until potatoes are just starting to brown, about 5 minutes. Stir in caraway and cook until fragrant, about 30 seconds.
3. Add tomatoes (with juices) and stock and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low and simmer until vegetables are fork tender, about 2-3 hours. Slice reserved sausage into 1/2-inch rounds and add to the pan along with spinach. Cook until sausage is heated through and spinach is wilted, about 2 minutes.

Are you sick of recipes yet? There are more coming, don't worry.

What goes on in San Fran...

...should stay there. I just got back from a weekend with friends in San Jose, CA. We spent a day in San Francisco, which has yet to fail in making for an interesting visit. Now, San Fran is all about being open-minded and accepting everyone, so they say. That's great, but does it mean accepting the consequences of a choice? I hope so. As we drove through one of the neighborhoods on a beautiful, sunny day, we spotted a man in a white hat. The man also had shoes and a backpack...but that was it. For a man who is conscientious enough to wear a hat on a sunny day, one might think he would take similar precautions for the other 97% of the body.

Maybe I need to think with an open mind.

Tuna cheesy goodness

Tonight I tried something new for dinner and it was tasty enough to write. Please forgive from those who like exact recipes. Here goes:

A few slices of bread (I made 3 sandwiches with one can, but loaf was a bit short.)

A can of tuna, in water

About 1/4 c. Ricotta cheese

Some green onion, chopped

A bit red onion, very thinly sliced

Enough mayonnaise to make it wet

Cheddar cheese

Olive oil

Cayenne pepper

Salt

Black pepper

Drain the tuna and mix in the onions, to taste, the Ricotta, and the mayo. Drizzle oil on each of the slices of bread. Grate some cheddar on each slice. Mound the tuna on half the slices. Add more grated cheddar. Top the sandwich with another slice of bread and drizzle more oil on outside of the bread. Cook until the cheese melts on a griddle or in a sandwich maker. I used a George Foreman grill. Broiled in the over might work too.

Here's another plug for comments: do you have an amazing sandwich?

What's with the background?

The thought may have crossed your mind, maybe, to aks what the background is with the seashell on the blog. No, it is not at the beach, nor at an environmental museum. It's not even in a seashell collection. This picture is of the dirt in Amsterdam. Weird? Maybe. Cool? Yes!

My cousin and I were there last May and we found a street unpaved due to some repair work. As luck would have it, there was a small collection of shells waiting for a photo op. The explanation I heard was that these are remnants of sea life when the land was actually sea floor. Some say the shell are carted in for the tourists, but after living there a few months and seeing shells in most dirt patches, including construction sites, I'm a little skeptical.

Either way, who would not think it was cool to find seashells while gardening? Pulling weeds, or cleaning out the irises, just got more interesting.

Pea pests - Spider mites

Much to my dismay, the pea plants came under attack last week. As I picked our scrumptious single pod, I noticed the leaves at the base of the plants turning yellow and drying out. Initially, it looked like the 85-90 F weather was killing them off, yet the top of the plants still looked fine. I took a closer look and found the largest plant covered in these little teeny black dots under all the leaves. (My tune in my head suddenly switched to the song about 'Little Black Things' that my dear brother taught me. Thank you, dear brother.) They moved all over and had built little webs at the base of each leaf. After some research, I figured they were spider mites and wanted them gone. They survive off the the juice in the leaves, which ends up killing the plants.

So, after more research, I found an at home recipe to get ride of them here. I used a modified version, since 1/2 gallons of this stuff was a little much for my tiny garden.

Recipe: 2 cups of water

5 Tablespoons potato flakes

1 Tablespoon buttermilk.

Stir. Apply.

Potato flour might have dissolved better, but I have yet to find some. So, I loaded my mixture into a washed out hairspray bottle that we had just finished off, and sprayed this all over the plants, especially on the bottom of the leaves. This is supposed to suffocate the little guys. After it dried for about a day, I washed it off and it looks like all the mites have gone to their Maker, though I will keep checking for signs of return. Maybe the plants will survive long enough to give us TWO pods now!

The Porcelain Throne

Toilet scrubbing may not always be the most conducive activity for contemplating fairy tales, weddings, and happily ever afters...and then reality, but with Britain celebrating the royal wedding today as the rest of the world looked on, those thoughts found a way through my skull.

Mostly, I wondered what I would like about living as a royal, not that I'm asking or predicting that such a thing would ever, ever happen. Would I enjoy not having to clean my own white throne? Would I be allowed to, even if I wanted?

As far as the marriage goes, would the demands of life ever allow for family time or spontaneous outings? Could you make dinner together or go on a date without someone else looking over your shoulder?

Luckily, in my fairy tale, the prince had no royal blood, nor was he extremely famous, extravagantly wealthy, nor friends with all the heads of state, but he wasn't a toad, either. (He even still had a full head of hair, unlike the royal prince.) And, best of all, the happily ever after part didn't end with the wedding. It only began there, even if I, myself, forever have to scrub my own porcelain bowl, I'll take it.

Would you?

Solar power

A lot of buzz about self-reliance has come past my door lately and this idea I had to share. It's a solar oven made with a spruced up windshield shade. It's something I want to try, especially since we have such an abundance of sun here in our lovely desert home.

http://www.solarcooking.org/plans/windshield-cooker.htm

Advice or tips are always welcome!

Easter and glue

I felt like a 3rd grader again this week. As it was Easter and neither of us had baskets, I decided to make them custom, rather than buy a meaningless hunk of plastic. Call me old-fashioned. Laugh if you will, but these cereal boxes definitely reached a new level of glory, just with fabric and glue. My fingers reached a new low by the same account. For the man, we have the black hockey puck style, with the favorite team logo, or sort of logo, and for the lady, we have a Wizard of Oz style, just cause it's cute. Thanks to all those who donated old jeans. Yes, you might have sat in those once.

Kitchen tips

This is maybe an eclectic list, but it's stuff to remember that doesn't belong with anything else.

• Red onions are not for stewing or slow-cooking. They look like death if you try it.
• To get honey, or other sticky things, off the measuring spoon/cup, lightly grease or spray the spoon/cup before dipping in.
• Baking soda makes a great non-scratching scrub. I have used it on glass and metal to get off old stains and, with a little effort, it actually works. No idea if it would be nice to non-stick pans though. Probably not.
• To sanitize reusable sponges, wet them thoroughly and zap them in the microwave until they get too hot to touch. Then remember not to touch until it cools!
• Add butter to tomato dishes to reduce the acidity.
• Tomatoes splatter! Add to pots or pans carefully!
• When planning a dinner for guests, make something that you are very comfortable making. Making that new dish you always wanted to try could turn out as a wreck.
• Also, with guests, make food that will be okay, even if they come a little late. Stir-fry and creamy pastas sitting on the stove for an extra 10 minutes, for example, don't look good squishy.

Here's hoping this list will grow, but it's at start. Do you have any additions?

Making stuff

Sometimes the need to make fun stuff comes on stronger than the proportional amount of time I have to actually complete the thing. I finally finished a project (after more than a year) for my sister's dolls. Maybe it is best for me to stick with very short term projects, like making the bed or dinner.



Another project of late was to recover our dining room chairs. Here is the before and after. Can you tell which is which? Okay, so these were my husband's chairs during college, and also at the time when he had roommates. One of these roommates needed a wheelchair to get around, which left his hands black from the wheels. White chairs with black stains make for a project for me.

They look a lot better, though I now have a violent hatred for our wimpy staple gun, if it can be called that. You can see the result of its 'labor,' most of which ended up in the garbage. It only took 600 staples to finish 4 chairs.

Suggestion for future projects: Use a gun that can actually penetrate the wood. Or just get an air compressor.